I heard Jesse leave at some point. Eventually, after I'd cried all I could, I went to the kitchen for a drink.I didn't bother to get dressed. What difference did it make? Jesse was right, I wasn't much better than a whore. And a lousy whore at that. Couldn't even pay my goddamned bills. I opened the refrigerator to find that the six-pack of Natty Ices I'd bought the night before were gone. That thieving little fucker.I fetched the half-empty bottle of cheap vodka from the back of the broom closet where I kept it hidden. That boy had been driving me to distraction for the past eighteen years, but I still loved the bastard. He'd always had his daddy's good looks, but lately I could see it in him more like a man instead of a boy. I thought this daddy and me would be together forever. Those were some wild days back then. Back when I had a body men would fight to get their hands on.My first swig of vodka went down hard, but it felt good by the time it hit my belly.I woke up on the sofa. The only trips that mattered became the ones I took with Megan and Robin and even then there seemed to be a wall between us that I just couldn’t get through or over. Anyway, here I am trying to get my head straight, wishing that I had never met Don’s sisters, let alone confided in them and listened to them. I can’t blame them for everything, let’s face it I was a willing slut, they didn’t have to twist my arm a whole lot, but I’m sure that without their prodding assistance, I would never have had the first affair let alone have gone as far as I did. Now while I still have hope, I know deep in my heart that Don would never trust me again. I am lucky that he has never tried to block my access to the girls because I don’t think he would have a hard time doing so. I hope that one day I will be able to do something to make up in some way for what I did. The girls are with me for the next couple of days, so I think I am going to try a few questions, whether they will answer, who knows,.
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